Sweet Adelaide's Birth Story

 Sunday night (the 3rd), I started to have some contractions. They weren't intense or anything, but they were definitely contractions. They started to come more and more frequently, but didn't really increase in intensity. I attempted to go to sleep (Caleb was having a hard time sleeping) and slept for about an hour or so when I was just too uncomfortable. I got up and started cleaning. I folded and put some laundry away, swept the floor, straightened up the bathroom some. I told Jeff that I thought that I might be going into labor- this was at about 2 or 2:30 am. Then, I continued to clean/organize. I told Jeff I would take a shower and then perhaps we should call the midwife. So, I showered, then got dressed and called the midwife. While I was showering the contractions were about 3 minutes apart. Otherwise, they were between 3 and 5 minutes apart. My midwife called back and we decided I'd come in.

On the way to the hospital, the contractions slowed down considerably. They would increase if I was moving though, so once we started walking again, I continued to have regular contractions. I checked in at about 4:30 am. My midwife, Jennifer, checked to see how dilated I was. I was 95% effaced but only 3 centimeters dilated. To say I was disappointed would be an understatement. I thought for sure I was farther along than that. They had me stay on a monitor to monitor my contractions and the baby for 30 minutes. I didn't have very many contractions during that time and the baby didn't have much variability in movement/ heart rate so they had me drink and they watched again. The baby started to have more variability in her heart rate, which was good. They let me get up and walk around, so Jeff, Caleb and I walked the halls and stairs of the quiet hospital.

At about 6:30 Jennifer came and checked me again. I was not quite a 5. Still, I was upset- I had hoped that I would have progressed more. They put me back on the monitor and again, my contractions slowed considerably and baby showed only some slight variation. I was encouraged to eat a snack if I could and to drink plenty. Finally, I was able to get up and walk more, so I did. I walked and walked and continued to have regular contractions while moving about. I also got in the shower, per the nurse's suggestion to see if that would help- and it did seem to help some.

Eventually, the contractions got more and more intense, though there would be large breaks in between these contractions, even while in active labor- which was a bit of relief. Somehow, I continued to progress and I had hoped to have the baby by 2pm- though at around 12, that didn't seem likely to me.

We tried different positions to help my posterior baby move and to help relieve some of the back labor. The pain was all in my back, I didn't feel anything in the front at all. The pain would radiate into my hips and thighs. Jeff would squeeze my hips each time a contraction came, which helped a great deal. Then the nurse would massage my back or press into my lower back. It really did help a ton. This was while I was on my hands and knees. (By this time, Jeff's mother had come, brought breakfast and hung out with Caleb and my grandmother, Momma Jean had come and took over hanging out with Caleb). Finally, we decided that I would get into the tub.

Soon after I entered the tub, I pretty much hit transition. Jennifer said that she thought I was in transition, but I thought there was no way I was already in transition- given how slow my progress was (at least in my eyes), but in hindsight, she was right. Those next few centimeters came really quickly and the contractions were extremely intense and right on top of each other. There seemed to be no relief. Jeff would offer to squeeze my hips, but I just felt like I couldn't be touched. I agonized all by myself and felt completely alone, even though there were people in the room with me. It was incredible, incredible pain. The midwife checked again, at Jeff's request and I was about an 8. We talked about having my water broken to see if that would help. I waited just a little bit longer and then my midwife suggested that I get out of the tub. I didn't want to move because every time I moved at all, I would be hit with the most excruciating pain I had ever before experienced. But, I knew she was right. I got out, and went to the bathroom. I had three contractions back to back then. I called Jeff in there with me, mostly just for support. The midwife came in after she could tell that the contractions weren't really stopping, helped me clean up and she and Jeff helped me to the bed. The contractions continued. On the bed, we thought, maybe she could break my water then, but she checked and I was nearly a 10 already. Still she attempted, but the baby's head was in the way and a contraction was coming and I couldn't take it. She may have nicked the bag of waters some, but that was all she was able to do. It was okay though because I was just about ready to push.

One or two contractions after I was on the bed, it was time. I pushed and pushed and unlike Caleb's delivery, where the pushing was the best part and relieved all of my back labor, this was incredibly painful, due to my completely posterior baby. At one point, I could feel her whole body turn around and it was amazing, but so painful at the same time. Jennifer told me later that she watched her head turn. Eek! I continued to push and the baby's head came out and I was done. I said I couldn't push anymore. I just couldn't do it. I expected her whole body to just come out the way that Caleb's did. It didn't. Her shoulder's were stuck. Her head was turning purple. Jeff was scared. The nurse looked at me and told me that I had to PUSH! Jennifer instructed me to push and the nurse to assist by pressing on my lower abdomen, while they pulled on the baby's head. One more good push and the baby was out and in my arms- finally! I really only pushed for 5 minutes, but it felt like an eternity.

I got to see my sweet girl and hold her on my chest for a few minutes while they rubbed her down trying to get her to cry, which she did. The purple went away and she was a beautiful pink. Jeff cut the umbilical cord after a few minutes. Then they took her away to get her measurements and do the APGAR while I delivered the placenta. Jeff took pictures of his baby girl. They brought her back to me, laid her on my chest and she immediately started rooting so I nursed her. She latched on right away and has been a pro nurser ever since. She ended up nursing for about an hour, during which Jeff was longing to hold her. He didn't get to hold her for the first hour and a half, sadly. He went and got Caleb and we introduced Caleb to his new sister. Jeff held baby Adelaide and I had Caleb on the bed with me. After a few minutes, Jeff went and got Momma Jean and she held our sweet girl for awhile before she left and we got moved to another room upstairs.

This was a really hard labor for me. I know lots of women go through this every day and I can't compare myself to them. But for me, it was really hard. My morale was down, the pain was intense, the progress was slower than I had anticipated. I prayed constantly throughout the entire process and sometimes to no relief it seemed, though in my heart and mind I was begging. There were times when I felt completely alone. It wasn't the beautiful experience that I expected and that I had with Caleb. And I think that's part of it. I had all of these expectations. I had only Caleb's birth as a reference. Everyone had told me that usually the second labor/delivery is easier, that it goes quicker. Oh, but this wasn't. The first part of labor wasn't too bad, actually. There were some bigger breaks in contractions. I was able to hold myself together, despite being disappointed at the slow progress that I was making (though I did complain at the very beginning that I was only a 3- I just couldn't believe that). I was calm, collected and stoic as I experienced those earlier contractions- even in active labor. But once I hit transition, I felt embarrassed, I felt I had no control over my body, I felt more pain than I had ever experienced before- even Caleb's was easier and his was also natural. I felt like I couldn't do it anymore. I didn't want to do it anymore. Of course, everyone kept telling me that I was doing a good job and that I was doing it and that it would all work out. I heard those words, but at the time, they didn't mean much to me. At one point, my midwife- noticing how much pain I was in, asked if I wanted an epidural. She said she was only going to ask once, but wanted to ask just in case. I said no thanks. Part of me wonders exactly what it was that I was trying to accomplish. Did I feel the need to prove myself to anyone? to myself? I don't know. I am grateful that I didn't have the epidural, though at the time I just wish they could have cut my back open. :) I am grateful that I had this experience. It was hard, and I know this seems ridiculous, but even thinking about it now, writing about it now, has been cathartic for me. I didn't realize quite what an emotional experience this was. Even now, I feel ridiculous expressing how difficult it was. Yesterday, someone asked me how the labor was. Do you know what my answer was? I said it was terrible. Boy, I wish I could go back in time. Because if I could, I definitely would not have said that. It was hard, but it wasn't terrible. I did have a wonderful team there helping me. I really appreciated my nurses, especially the newer one. I loved my midwife. And Jeff was awesome. I just knew that though they were all there for me, they couldn't bare this pain that I experienced for me. Yes, an epidural would have made the pain bearable. But I was already committed to delivering my baby naturally. I wanted to feel it all- I just didn't want it to hurt as bad as it did. I've learned that no two experiences are the same. I wish I didn't have so many expectations. Maybe it would have been easier then.

Also, like Caleb's birth, during transition, in between those intense contractions, I did feel a bit of relief, like I wasn't even there, like I was in some far away place. That, to me, is a miracle. I am so grateful that I could somehow manage to escape for a few seconds at a time before that pain hit again. That part is beautiful. And holding my sweet, sweet baby girl in my arms for the very first time after such a hard experience was beautiful. It was beautiful and it was relieving and it was happy. And I am grateful for that. Seeing Caleb interact with his new baby sister was beautiful. Watching Jeff love his baby girl was beautiful. So all in all, I guess I can say that it was beautiful. It was hard, but it was beautiful.

Oh- Adelaide was born at 2:31pm on Monday, Feb. 4th, 2013. She weighed 7lbs. 14 1/2 oz. (but they rounded it up to 15oz.) She was 20 1/2 inches long.

Jeff and Caleb hanging out.

See? Smiling.

I was in love with these popsicles.. eating between contractions.

Thanks Jeff.

My first time seeing my baby girl.

Marveling.

I couldn't stop smiling at her.

First photo before Caleb came in.

Look at that little hand.

Jeff finally got to hold his baby girl. 

I didn't notice this picture until I posted it on facebook. I love the way Caleb is looking at me. He is so precious!

Our first family photo a couple of hours after sweet Adelaide was born (and yes, Caleb changed his shirt like 3 times throughout the course of the day).

Love.

First Day Out

Yesterday, I decided that we would all venture out into the world. I had left my cell phone charger at the hospital and though we tried, there was not another charger like it to be found- apparently my phone is too old. However nice it was not to have a phone, it was getting to the point where I needed to make phone calls and had no way to do so. My sister came to visit the other day and I used her phone to call the hospital to see if it was still there and it was!

So that brings us back to yesterday. Since it was such a beautiful day, I figured it would be the perfect day to venture out. I had hoped to get a fairly early start, however, it takes a lot longer getting two kids ready and out the door. Add into the mix, naps, meals, impromptu dance parties, last-minute diaper changes, showers, cleaning up messes a certain toddler made while I showered and well, we didn't make it out of the house until after 2.

When we did leave- it was definitely an adventure. It actually started as I was leaving my driveway. I hit my mailbox. I didn't just hit it, I knocked it down and it left a nice brown line all across the side of my white van. I pulled back into my driveway, checked the damages and then proceeded to cry. Mostly because I was already exhausted just from trying to get ready and out of the door and because I didn't even have a way to call and tell Jeff about it right away.

We headed to the hospital and when we got there, I first went to pick up my charger and then I headed to see if any of the midwives were available in the office.  Turns out they weren't. I was kind of bummed because I wanted to introduce them to Adelaide and I was hoping to see my midwife, but she was off delivering another baby. As we were heading back to the car, some guy commented on how I had a little one and was pregnant again. He was referring to Caleb, who was pushing the stroller. I told him that I had just had a baby 8 days ago. Unfortunately, I am not one of those lucky women whose tummy's regain their shape soon after delivery. We headed back to the car where I nursed Adelaide and gave Caleb a little snack.

After both babies had eaten and were happy, we headed to Kroger. I don't know why, but I parked towards the end of the parking lot. On nice days, I usually tend to do that anyway, it's nice as an extra excuse to be outside for a little extra time. Anyway, I carried Adelaide in her seat and Caleb in my arms to a cart. I put Adelaide down into the basket and Caleb sat up front. I started my grocery shopping. I only had a few things that I needed/wanted to get. I wasn't intending on doing  a full shopping trip. So we gathered my few things only to realize that I had left the money in the car. Ha! So, I left the cart near the cash register, rearranged the goods so that I could get Adelaide out of the cart and picked up Caleb and we headed to get a different cart so that I wouldn't have to carry them all the way to the car and back. I grabbed the money and we headed back in to pay for the goods.

On the way back to the car, I realized that I had forgotten one of the most essential items that I needed, so instead of getting it from Kroger, I decided to head to Target. I love Target. Anyway, nothing too eventful happened at Target, except that I ended up getting a few more items than I had originally planned (who doesn't when they go into Target?) and Caleb decided to "drop" a few items for me to pick up when I wasn't looking.

We were all pretty exhausted (and I was in a bit of pain) by the end of our trip out. Adelaide pretty much slept the entire time we were out, except for when I nursed her. Caleb was asleep before we got home (about a five minute drive). And I could hardly keep my eyes open by 8 and was asleep before 9.

Today, I think we'll stay in.

P.S. I'm glad that life is such a grand adventure. I'm also glad that we can find humor in life's adventures. And, I am grateful that I have these two awesome kiddos and a wonderful husband to share in and add to my adventures. :)

She was crying and Caleb tried cheering her up.

"Oh Caleb, stop it!" :)

1 Week Old.

One week ago today, I was in the hospital in labor with my sweet baby girl, Adelaide. We didn't know if we were having a boy or a girl and though it was a painful and exhausting experience, it was also an amazing blessing and miracle to have my sweet baby girl placed in my arms. (Birth story to follow later).

I can't believe Adelaide has been with us for a week already. This time was different, of course, from when Caleb was born. We came straight home after he was born. We only had to stay at the birthing center for 4 hours. This time, we had to stay in the hospital for two days, so I didn't get to come home with baby girl until Wednesday. Caleb and Jeff spent a lot of time at the hospital with me and we had visitors (family, friends and my midwife all made it bearable) which was nice. Caleb did awesome! He is seriously going to be such a great big brother and I'm glad that he got to be there right after Adelaide was born (he was actually at the hospital the whole time). He was happy to see his mommy and happy to meet his baby sister.

Since being home, we are learning so much. It's almost like having a newborn for the first time. Adelaide is such a different baby than Caleb was. She's already an awesome nurser. She latched on pretty much, right away and continues to do so well. She also sleeps well and whereas Caleb often had troubles with reflux, even at a tiny age, we haven't noticed that with Adelaide. She loves to be held and I just love to hold her, so it's been interesting finding a balance between holding her and holding Caleb who also loves to be held and of course played with.

Caleb loves to wrestle and will sometimes try to "smother" Adelaide. We have to remind him to be gentle. When she's upset, he tries to comfort her and will give her kisses. He rubs her head and pats her belly- seriously, the cutest thing ever. Even before we introduced the pacifier to Adelaide, Caleb found one and tried giving it to her. He's such a thoughtful little guy.

It has been a little challenging for him though. He's had a hard time dealing when I've been nursing Adelaide and he wants to be held (usually first thing in the morning). He's been doing a bit more screaming and throwing things, which partly is because of his age and partly, I'm assuming, because of all of the adjusting he's having to do. Jeff and I have been trying to make sure we each give him some one-on-one time. It was a great help, too, because Jeff was off all of last week. But, Jeff is back to work today.

Caleb also likes to help out and so we've been asking him to help with tasks and he's been mostly happy to do it. His favorite thing to do is hold his baby sister.

Anyway, it's been a great joy having Adelaide join our family. It still seems a bit unreal that I am now the mother of these two beautiful, wonderful children. Seriously, how did I get so lucky?

With that, here's our newborn photo shoot with the little miss (there are a lot- I had a hard time narrowing them down more than I did, so brace yourself). At some point, I'd like to get both kiddos together.

I love this smile!

I love the expression on her face in this one.

I love those beautiful dark eyes.

My aunt got her this adorable dress- so naturally, I had to include it in our shoot. 

I just love baby feet.